Max Riffner: Happy Birthday To Me

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Happy Birthday To Me

Today is my birthday, the same day as other national tragedies such as Waco and the Oklahoma City Bombing. Last night we went and saw the Yeah Yeah Yeahs at Sokol.

The most telling part of the evening – buying the kid standing in line with me a Diet Coke. I offered to buy him a beer, but he was only 19 (and apparently, really responsible, because I would have been getting a beer or three if I was 19). I was talking about seeing Morphine at Sokol back in 1998 right before Mark Sandman died, and he said something to the effect that he was still in grade school then.

Ouch.

The knife. Someone pull it out, please?

Wednesday April 19, 2006

Tim Lenon
Apr 19, 11:12 AM

# 1

Let me twist the knife a bit grandpa.

You are actually getting old and not just smelling like it.

I’ll buy you some old spice for your birthday to help cover the malodorous cloud of cheap wiskey and stale cigar.

The Chief
Apr 19, 12:30 PM

# 2

It’s a good thing that we are so cool then, right?

Happy Birthday!!!

Timothy
Apr 19, 12:43 PM

# 3

Trust no one over 30.

queue_t
Apr 19, 05:05 PM

# 4

Happy Birthday Max- sucks to share the day with tradgedy.

I aint getting any younger either. take it easy

Tamara

kate
Apr 19, 07:46 PM

# 5

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

dude, stories like that happen to me EVERYDAY. I never even really thought about my own mortality or aging until I started teaching college kids. “tell me what it was like seeing pavement, kate”. etc, etc, late 90’s, etc, not thinking that you are old, etc, realizing that you are teaching kids who you feel are your age and realizing that you are almost 10 years older than them and that they SOOOO don’t think that you are close in age to them. at. all.

LOVE your fat guy comic. I feel like that.

Megan
Apr 19, 08:15 PM

# 6

I was at the bar not too long ago with workfriends and a younger co-worker said to me,”Your like my mom, but your not.” I think she was trying to say I appreciate your advice, but OUCH. I walked around in a haze for several minutes repeating that phrase in my head.

jason caskey
Apr 20, 08:48 AM

# 7

A number of years ago when I had a job where I supervised high school and college students I had my "God, I’m old" moment;

Several of us were sitting at a table on break. One of the high school girls was telling us a story about her mom getting mad at her for coming home at 1:30 AM. Her curfew was 12:30, so she didn’t feel her mom should have gotten so angry. Before I realized it, I was blurting out "There was no good reason for you to be out that late!"

I said that. Me. The guy who used to come home at sunrise!

Happy Birthday, Max!
JC

Max
Apr 20, 10:35 AM

# 8

@Tim L: My whiskey isn’t cheap, you bastard. :)

@The Chief: Thanks for a great day, baby. You are the best wife a guy could have. And yes, we’re still cool, sorta :)

@Tim C: So do we trust ourselves in a year or two?

@Tamara: Yeah, it does kind of suck to share the day, but it sucked worse for the people that died in those events, so I consider myself lucky. Thankfully, the Columbine kids missed my birthday by a day (although it was chilling to hear they were planning on the 19th). Thanks for the birthday wishes!

@Kate: This is exactly how I felt at the show. I realized that I was that guy, you know, the old man at the show. I would really feel bad if we had bad jobs, like telemarketing or something. My comics work helps raise my coolness up a bit in the eyes of the youngsters (if they read), as I’m sure it does with you being a design professor.

Hopefully you’ll be seeing some more of the little fat guy comic soon. I think I’m going to start a web journal comic here. I doodle myself like that all the time.

@Megan: Oh man, that was below the belt. I’d have smacked her like her mom did.

@Jason: This story made me snort coffee. It has caffinated my sinuses.

@All: Thanks so much for the birthday wishes! You are all awesome! I had a great day.

E
Apr 21, 12:07 PM

# 9

Figures, true to form, I’m late.

Happy Birthday, Mr. Max.

I’d say something profound, but I’m older than you, thus my mind doesn’t work as well, because I’m older than you, thus my mind doesn’t work as well, because I’m older than you, thus my mind doesn’t work as well, because I’m older than you, thus my mind doesn’t work as well… so I can do more coke.