Max Riffner

The Parlor

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On Left

Every time I ride on the trail, I always yell out “On Left!” as I pass walkers and runners. Some of them listen. Most don’t. Most are walking like morons with their dogs all over the trail. I almost plowed into one guy tonight as he was enamored with something on the other side of the trail and apparently not listening to me yell at him several times.

I hate these people.

But I still yell out, because they are a lot of asshole spandex riders who don’t. When I used to run, they would scare the hell out of me when they swooshed by me, riding on stealth mode (unless it’s someone with a mountain bike — you can hear knobbies coming for awhile).

Spandex set: announce yourselves.

Walkers: get out of the way.

Dogs: Um, don’t bite me?

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