I picked my mother up from the airport today, horribly tired. The dogs kept me up most of the night (one of them got up and took a nasty crap in the bedroom, oddly enough). Anyhow, a cabbie almost ran a light as we were going through an intersection leaving the airport. He saw the light, and saw us, and almost decided to crawl through the intersection anyway. I then uttered “Fucking Prick“ in a low, gutteral growl.
And then I realized that I had just not only dropped an F-bomb in front of my mother, but then I had added the word “prick,” in front of my mother.
I’ve only swore once in front of my mother, after I had taken a corner too sharp on my dirt bike and wiped out on gravel. She collected me and took me home, and I mentioned the “goddamn gravel” (I was all of eight, I think). She told me never to swear in front of her again, and I hadn’t, ever.
I told her I was sorry. I was distracted for the rest of the car ride to my parent’s home.
Later, when describing herself, she thought of herself as a “perky bitch,” which made me laugh. I told her I just thought of her as perky, which she then said was good. We both agreed that I had best not think of her as a bitch.
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